How I Made a Green Drink,Or How I Made a Green Drink Better

‘How do we motivate people to make soft drinks part of their morning ritual in the same way as tea or coffee?’

— Coca-Cola Enterprises Inc.sales report


In reference to their developing smoothie line.Coca-Cola busting into breakfast with “refreshing, healthy, and tasty alternatives” to a glass of agua in the AM. I imagine this morning mis-start will hover some where between Fanta and GoGurt tastewise.


I don’t buy them, but I make them. They are a convenient way to eat a lot of very good things. Along with coffee, they are indeed my morning ritual.

So I wanted to learn a little more about the liquid meal..

Smoothie Mile Stones:

Pre 1900s: Blended fruit drinks were common in Latin American cultures, as well as in India (home of the Lassi, the original yoghurt smoothie).


1930s: American West Coast (we do love our super foods) health stores start selling blended fruit drinks.

1940s: Waring Blender Cookbook includes recipes for banana and pineapple blend ups.

Hippie Dippie 60s: Free spirit health gurus embrace macrobiotic vegetarianism. The term ‘Smoothie’ starts to get tossed around


1973: Steve Kuhnau founds the first Smoothie King in Louisiana (Louisiana? I would have thought California for sure), experimenting with smoothie ingredients such as yoghurt, protein powder, and vitamins. Chains spread nation wide; Smoothie becomes a household word.


1980s: Popularity of sports and fitness led to the marketing of specialized juice and smoothie bars. Nutrition science enters the blender.

1990: Jamba Juice turns milkshakes into health food. Every one From Mcdonald’s to Odwalla jumps on the joke of a smoothie band wagon.

2012: Sean buys a Vitamix 5200 and makes a Green Smoothie


And so we come to part 2 of this post.

My green smoothie recipe.

A good green smoothie is like any good 21st century machine.

Its components are interchangeable and interchangeable based on convenience and function. There are hundreds of recipes on the web, pictured as holy vessels full of exotic fruits and garnished with fresh mint leaves.

Get over yourself its just kale

Get over yourself its just kale

Confusion abounds, and many end up with an every thing but the kitchen sink drink.

Just remember to KISS.

Keep It O Smooth and Simple


First 5 are essential, Second 3 are optional

1) 1 cup hard greens
(kale, collards, spinach, bok choy, cucumber, celery)

2) 3 finger pinch salt to provide flavor contrast

3) 20 grams sweetness of some form
(1 cup coco water,orange, banana, 1/2 apple, 1 1/2 medjool date, 3/4 cup berries, 1 tb honey, Kombucha, roasted sweet tater…)

4) One serving fat
(2tb nut butter, 1/2 yogurt, 1/2 avocado, 1tb coconut oil, or fresh coconut meat)

5) One cup filtered water or ice

Bonuses Added to Taste:

1) SPICE: (Cinnamon, cacao powder vanilla, curry, tumeric, allspice, ginger root, cayenne, fennel, garam masala, paprica)

2) HERB: Mint, Cilanro, Basil, tea leaves,

3) FUNCTION: hemp seeds, lemon juice, protein powder, spirulina, maca, chia, Brazil nut, cacao nibs, bee pollen,

Toss it in blender, flick it to high until smooth.

All this together would be quite a disappointing goulash, but the right combos are not hard to pick. Match the green drink to the need and accommodate what you have in the fridge (avocados on sale? lot of ginger root in the ol’ CSA, Bananas going brown?, need a little protein? post exercise carb maybe?).

Select a sweet, green, and fat source. 2-3 Herbs and spices for flavor and any fun functional bonuses that intrigue.


Post Crossfit workout: Coco water, kale, 2 tb hemp protein, spirulina, cinnamon, cayenne, sea salt, cacao nibs, 2 tb almond butter


tastes like pumpkin pie

Savory Breakfast for Busy morning: kombucha, collard curry, 1/2 avocado, lemon juice, 1 tb chia, Brazil nut, sea salt, whole cayenne pepper


tastes like spicy curry

Throughout the morning at work sipper: coco oil, 1/2 apple, spinach and celery, mint, fennel seed, spirulina, vanilla, a little cacao powder , sea salt


Tastes mellow and cooling.

Raise your jar in oppositional toast. Coka-Cola, go blend your morning corn syrup somewhere else, ’cause today I am drinking collard that taste like cream.




One Comment on “How I Made a Green Drink,Or How I Made a Green Drink Better”

  1. Love this. Coca Cola – horrifying. x

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